Confessions Of A Cookie-Challenged Mom…

Well, it’s happened again. I’m really not sure if I’ll ever learn the lesson. I’ve come to the painful conclusion that there is something inherently wrong with me that I am absolutely INCAPABLE of baking a batch of cookies. Edible cookies, that is. I used to be a sort-of good baker. Admittedly, my creations were often not pretty to look. I never was deluded into thinking I could pass myself off as a baked goods artiste. But, the treats I baked always tasted pretty darn good. I think I probably just got lazy over the years. But, I mean, seriously, why the heck can’t I bake a decent batch of cookies anymore? I’m not exaggerating. Just ask my family. When I tell them I’m baking, there is an audible groan. One day, after an unsuccessful attempt, which resulted in a pan of lumpy black charcoals, I set the smoking pan outside on the deck. When my husband came home from work, he saw the pan outside and casually said, “Were you baking today?” Continue reading “Confessions Of A Cookie-Challenged Mom…”

Episode 22 – The Curious Case of the Candy Lawsuits

On today’s episode, Marilyn has a bone to pick with a couple California women who brought lawsuits against candy companies.  But, the more she thinks about it…Marilyn might just have a lawsuit of her own.  Want to find out which evil corporation she’s going to sue?  Then give this episode a listen and make sure to rate, review, and subscribe on iTunes!!!

Episode 19 – The Vacation Episode

 

Marilyn is back from her Arizona vacation with stories to tell!  How was her first experience with Uber?  Did she encounter any desert wild life? You’ll have to listen to find out!  Don’t forget to rate, review, and subscribe on iTunes!

Episode 18 – Guilty Pleasures

 

We start off today’s episode with a few more things Marilyn hates.  Then we hear about some of her guilty pleasure bands and songs.  And BONUS…a little “Who sang it better?” with Marilyn and one of her guilty pleasures.  You’re going to want to listen to this one! Don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review!

Episode 17 – Things I Hate…And a Few Things I Love

Today Marilyn tells us about a few things she hates that everyone else seems to love.  And believe it or not, there are a few things she loves that other people seem to hate.  If you’re enjoying the podcast, remember to rate, review, and subscribe on the podcast app!!!

Episode 15 – Adventures at Summer Camp

 

Today Marilyn tells us about the summer she spent at camp as a child…and, as you probably guessed, she did NOT enjoy it.  If you’ve ever wondered why Marilyn isn’t an “outdoorsy” person, this episode is a good place to start!  Let us know about your summer camp experiences (good or bad) and we’ll talk about them on air!

And Another Thing…

 

How could I forget to include the MOST annoying post that is BLOWING UP my Facebook feed? It was the reason for my most recent podcast episode and yet, I failed to include it. In that last episode, I went on a bit of a rant (one of my favorite things to do) about the many…MANY things that drive me crazy on Facebook. But I completely omitted one of the things that currently has me screaming at my newsfeed: the live cams. O.M.G. STOP POSTING THESE THINGS PEOPLE. JUST STOP. I don’t care about the giraffe who apparently has been on the brink of delivering the first baby giraffe in a hundred years. Well, I’m assuming it’s been that long because people are going absolutely BESERK over it.

Last week, a Facebook “friend” (I’m definitely redefining that word), was in a frenzy of panic thinking she had missed the momentous occasion. “Oh nooooo, did I miss it?” Her despair over that possibility made me wonder if she spends all day staring at her computer just waiting…waiting…waiting. And I could only imagine that she might have needed to use the bathroom and in those fleeting minutes, MISSED the giraffe birth. Thank God, someone immediately soothed her growing panic by assuring her that, No, no nothing had happened. She hadn’t missed anything. The mom giraffe is still laying in the corner of her giraffe pen. We’re all still waiting. THANK GOD.

In addition to the (supposedly) impending birth, I am seeing random pictures of giraffes now, too, because people are now super enamored with them. Really?? I’m beginning to suspect there might be something more sinister afoot; possibly some giraffe lobby which has begun to fear that the general public was SOMEHOW losing interest in giraffes and SOMETHING had to be done to correct that.

But, I’ve learned that giraffes are not the only phenomenon the Facebook population seems obsessed with. The other live cam barrage I’m experiencing is the Eagle Nest. I’m not sure if it’s a particular nest we’re all watching or just eagles in general. I know eagles are pretty cool but I’m eagled-out not only because of the endless, relentless, unremitting, continuous, and interminable (yes, I consulted a thesaurus for emphasis) live-cam posts on my newsfeed, but I also happen to be the recipient of nonstop photgraphs of eagles by an insane FB eagle-photographing afficianado. I want SO badly to comment: OMG we GET it…you like eagles.

I could go on, but I’ll spare you until a future podcast episode. You’ve been warned…

Five’ll Get Ya Ten…Whether Ya’ Want It Or Not

I hate coupons. I hate when I strategically choose a checkout line based on a carefully formed algorithm I’ve devised: number of people in said line, approximate number of item in carts, the gender of said shoppers (sorry, women take longer), and the checkout clerk on duty, only to find myself  behind someone sifting through her (yes, her) neatly sorted organizer. And this display always occurs after I’ve emptied my cart and several people are behind me in line. At this point, I come to the crushing realization that I’ve been deceived and am now trapped. Kill me now. Why? Because what will unfold next is as predictable as a made-for-TV movie. After a relentless search for one or more coupons for each item on the belt, there is ALWAYS an issue with one (or more) leading to an insistence on the part of the customer that, YES, this coupon IS good for .25 off the purchase of four Suave deodorants on top of the posted sale sign on the shelf and the helpless clerk responding that, sorry, it did not ring up at that sale price, all the while thinking “I hate my job.” This leads to the clerk sending out an SOS to anyone within earshot to please go check the deodorant shelf for confirmation. Slow motion the next five minutes (because apparently, I’m the only one who is ever in a hurry), the messenger returns with the sign clearly stating the sale was, in fact, for Secret deodorant. The indignant customer then accuses the store of deceptive marketing because the Suave and Secret deodorants are neighbors on the shelf and bear a remarkable resemblance, and as a result, the sale price should be honored on the grounds of pain and suffering she endured during the whole checking-out ordeal. Time to cue the manager and for me to roll my eyes, heave a huge sigh and play Candy Crush on my phone in a feeble attempt to keep my composure.

Who are the real victims here? That’s right: me and all the other poor schnooks who were tricked into thinking this would be a quick in and out trip to the store. Finally, my moment has arrived. After ringing up my items, the clerk asks the inevitable question: “Do you have any coupons? Would you like to become a member of our Savings Club? You could save 20% off your first purchase and receive offers for huge savings throughout the year.” NO! NO! I do NOT want to save money. I just want to pay a lot more for my stuff and get the hell out of here. That’s when I see the look of gratitude on the clerk’s face and my suffering line-mates. Their eyes say it all. Thank you. Thank you. I nod back in a show of solidarity and a silent encouragement that they, too, will get through this.

Episode 11 – Warning: Bikini Season Around The Corner!

 

Well, bikini season is right around the corner and that means it’s diet season!  In this episode, you’ll hear all about Marilyn’s adventures with dieting, working out, and weight watchers.

 

Episode 10 – What’s in a Name?

 

Do you like your name?  Do you hate your name?  Would you change your name if you could?  Hear what our host thinks of her name and about the struggle that is naming your kids.